That your writing consistently has real humanity is a treasure, D.

I’ve always had an incredibly difficult time reaching orgasm with another person, though I can on occasion. When I do cum with my present partner, we both feel such a sense of accomplishment. It’s an achievement for each of us- a shared effort. Usually, though, we both have our fun without order. I don’t have to reach any sort of “finish line” to feel thoroughly fucked- when I used to feel like I absolutely had to orgasm, I set myself up for failure. Orgasm isn’t the be-all end-all to sex.

As for the forum/matchmaking service/hedonistic wonderland, that sounds absolutely fantastic. For casual encounters and lasting partnerships, I don’t doubt that Debauchette could pair her faithfuls off perfectly.

oxoxoxox

but I’m paraphrasing. The forum/matchmaking/etc. idea sounds very nice, but I think could only exist in some kind of utopia.

I do think that the advice that men please their women first is a good suggestion for men who come more quickly than they would like. It’s certainly effective for distracting a woman from noting the time length of the physical sex.

On orgasms, God, where do I start? I had a boyfriend that told me, very loudly and arrogantly that women are responsible for their own orgasms. It totally turned me off. But he is arrogant and obnoxious. uhhg.

I started masturbating very early. When I started having sex, in my late teens, it was very difficult to have an orgasm. I didn’t come to a guy until I was eighteen. It seems to be much more difficult to come with a man I have emotional feelings for than it is with a casual encounter. But only in the beginning of a relationship. It’s as if my emotions shut down my clitoris. I have found that what I need from a man is patience. If a man whispers, “I’ll keep at it if it takes all night”, I’ll come in a second. It’s the pressure and emotions that can take me awhile. Also, I do not masturbate with vibrators very often. Actually, I try not to masturbate very often at all because it does tend to desensitize my clitoris. Once, I laid off of masturbating completely and could come smoothly and easily while making love (penetration only). I wish I was multiple like some ladies I’ve met, but my limit is five on a veeery good day. Usually one or two really big ones a day keeps me a happy little girl.